Berenstein Bothers

I finally figured out the other day what bothers me about the Berenstein Bears. The PBS cartoon version, that is. I had four or five of the books when I was a kid, and I remember liking the drawing style of the backgrounds, especially the landforms and trees and such, more than the bears, though they had their charms.

Ann watches the TV version sometimes. It’s a cartoon, so the fact that the bears are thoroughly anthropomorphic doesn’t bother me. Well, it bothers me a little, because the Bears have virtually no bear nature. The other day a doctor bear educated the cubs about the virtues of the food pyramid—the same one you’d see on a cereal box, a human one in other words. A bear food pyramid wouldn’t look anything like that, but instead might feature salmon at the base, wild honey and berries in the middle, and scavenged food from campsites at the apex.

But what really bothers me is Mama Bear’s voice. It’s a lovely voice, done by a Canadian woman named Camilla Scott. Too lovely. There’s nothing remotely bearish about it. This is true for the other characters, but their voices are more ordinary. If I were casting Mama Bear’s voice, I’d want her to sound more like Marge Simpson. Not exactly, since the two cartoons are and need to be worlds apart, but in that direction, a voice with some edge to it.